I Eat Too Fast

9 May 2023

I eat like a ravenous hydra, suck down my soup like a vampiric scepter.

What is food to me?

Food is just fuel for the body. Some people like to savor their experience, I like to get mine over with There’s always room for dessert and limited time in a day. Let’s move quickly okay? So we have time for dessert.

Food is something to talk over. Before consumption, food is a deadly topic for conversation, a meek battle where democracy meets the hazy mind of the half remembered hungry. And eventually a compromise is found because, really I’m just hungry and I don’t care what we’re eating.

Then during the actual meal, food swaps places, becoming the backdrop to the more important conversation. Instead of food, I prefer to talk about you, your life, and what’s been happening in it. The best meals are the one’s that go slowly because we leave time to talk between bites, creating a natural cadence of ingestion and exhalation.

“I don’t think I really enjoy my food”

“Jesus, what the hell you’re already done!?”